February 20, 2013
Struggles & Victories
Life has been good recently (to catch a glimpse of what I mean specifically, check out my last post!). There is truly little I can complain about: I am blessed by a loving husband who is kind and gentle and enjoys me (and I him!); my in-laws are wonderful (we had a great meal and catch up with them yesterday!); my parents and brother are fun and God-honoring and we have a great relationship. There’s a roof over my head and food in my fridge and I have a great job that I enjoy.
So why do I feel a bit down these days? A bit like complaining and, frankly, having a bit of a pity party? Of course we all have days like this (the now-popular phrase and hashtag “#FirstWorldProblems” comes to mind) and it’s okay to be down and recognize what your problems are in the moment – it’s all relative. BUT…it’s not a place I can stay. In fact, life gets worse and I get more bitter if I stay focused on the stuff that gets me down, however relevant it might be. More than that, it was a bad decision to memorize Philippians 2:14: “Do everything without grumbling or complaining…” Really? 
It’s always in my mind! But I wanted to share a few things that have been putting me off and that require me to take action and make some change:
- Time with God. As per my 2013 goals, I’ve been more committed to spending time with God – not because I “should” or “have to” but in order to know him deeper. I think I’ve slipped into the realm of reading his Word and even journaling without remembering to seek his face for the sake of knowing Jesus better. I want to go in, dig deep and focus on our relationship, not just read a few chapters and call it a day. And it changes my day and view and attitude immensely when I do and don’t take time for him (*note to self*).
- My eating. It’s controlling me, not the other way around! I reposted this photo on my Facebook page and have been enjoying the discussion it’s prompted so far:
Lots of good thoughts over there and the discussion goes deeper and in different directions than what you might first think! But overall, I just don’t feel like I’ve been a good example of this recently. Sure, I eat healthy foods. And yes, I also eat unhealthy ones. But I think more than that I just haven’t been super balanced recently – just eating lots of everything and not controlling myself much. You know I’m not one for restriction but I don’t feel good when I let myself go too much. Still trying to see that change in my body (those 5-7 lbs I’ve referenced that I gained and cannot get off!) – but that won’t happen unless I treat my body well!
- My lack of plans/outings. Mikey’s going strong in school and needs time to study and get caught up on his regular work and Survive & Thrive details, which is fine except that I’m not the best planner when left to my own devices! I need to make plans, to get out and do things, to not let his weekend at home make me stuck at home (although I do love creating a supportive atmosphere at home for him to study!).
However, there are some victories in the midst of my struggles too…
- I’m realizing that I am a work in progress and am more or less celebrating my body. I have my days, sure, but at the same time I am learning to celebrate being me and being fit, capable and healthy. There are also days I realize that all this doesn’t matter in the long run – at least it’s not the bottom line. And sometimes those thoughts and time spent worrying about my body and health just are not worth the rest of life – people, work, life events, God!
- I am loved by a God who reaches out toward us on the idea of grace and forgiveness – so I can get back up again after a bad few days of eating or some negative self talk (working on it!) for bigger reasons than because “I’m worth it” or “My body deserves it” or “[insert fitness slogan on Pinterest here]” but because I am loved by God. Those are all good reasons, but knowing that I am sought after by God, that I am fueled by his love and that my life has been redeemed and repurposed gives me energy and life! And it needs to be a daily reminder for me to act upon it.
- I improved my pull ups! I LOVED working on this skill for the last 30+ days after finding this pull up program from a FitFluential friend Amanda who completed the program (her results were awesome! – and much cleaner than my pull ups). So, after sticking with it consistently and enjoying every minute, want to see how I did?! I started doing about 3-4 before I dropped, and yesterday I did:
Wahoo! …now that’s something to celebrate.
Do you ever get stuck in a rut in your food, your thinking, your relationships with God and others? How do you get out of it? Do you resonate with any of these struggles? And share some victories with me!
Thanks for being a good sounding board to me! I appreciate you guys and my blog being a place where I can be honest and chat about the good, bad and the ugly (pull up form). Live well & be well!
Bonnie
D5 Creation
Bonnie I am so proud of you! WOWWEEE that is so good! Wish I could do that many pullups!
Loved your post too! Maybe you just need to come home for a visit now that would put a smile on your face!
Love you,
mom
Wow….all those pullups!
marilyn chalmers recently posted..Love Yourself
Hey thanks, mom! I’m doing okay – I hope it doesn’t come across as too down – I’m not! Just up and down and it’s life.
Hopefully that comes across the right way. Thanks for the pull up comments – feeling good about my progress! 
I LOVE YOU!
HAHA!!! Great job!!! Sounds like the program worked awesome for you as well. You cracked me up with the multiple tries. I definitely only did one set for testing and then stopped with pullups for awhile.
Amanda Perry @ Sistas of Strength recently posted..Refreshed
I love you so much! SO much to be grateful for!
Meg recently posted..WIAW: Inspired
Just know this, God made you in his image. Food is a gift and those 5lbs look damn good on you. But i totally understand. love ya!
lindsay recently posted..Try it out Tuesday: Strength Exercises for Runners
Bonnie,
Excellent pull-up job! You made it look so easy. Must be the scottish blood coursing through your veins. I counted 12 the first time you were up, but anyway I am so proud of you. Makes me want to take the challenge also. We’ll see?? Thanks for your blogs – especially the one where you honored my birthday. The pictures brought back so many memories of Cabo. We have to do that again some time. Blessings to you this day sweetheart. Love you more than you love me!!!!
chalmers
Don chalmers recently posted..Love Yourself
Cute video! I am just dying for the day I can actually do a dead hang pull up. Working on it a lot these days…
Anyway, a very relatable post, as I’m sure you know. That was a great reminder pic on your FB page and one I definitely struggle with from time to time.
Listened to my church’s sermon this morning that I missed Sunday, talked about just having the desire to seek God is SO good and you clearly have that desire or you wouldn’ tbe writing about it. There are rough patches but you will get through and learn from them. Thanks for always providing inpsiring content!
Ericka @ The Sweet Life recently posted..Exercise on Vacation — It’s Worth Feeling Awesome
Inspiring content! That’s so humbling and fun to hear; thanks for saying that, Ericka! I really appreciate your note about the desire being there; I guess that’s true but I never thought of it that way. I tend to think about how I *should* be more desiring or focused rather than how much desire is there in the first place. Thanks for that reminder of truth.
Thanks, dad! I LOVE pull ups and getting a comment on my blog from you is ever better than 13 of them in a row.
I thought I did 12 the first time too but recounted and got 11…? Now it’s wrong on the video! lol. Take the challenge – you will NOT be disappointed! Follow the program and see what happens!
Love you so much; I really appreciate your comment and the kind words. Have a great rest of your day and let’s meet again in Cabo soon!
THANK YOU for this! I know this is truth, but I’m glad you also understand – 5 lbs on a small frame, although not much, just makes me softer in areas I don’t want to be.
Thanks for understanding while also encouraging me with truth! …that’s what good friends do and do well. 
YES – you’re so right, Meg – tons to be grateful for. Thanks for that reminder!
hehe – yeah, I wanted to see how many I could get and also get them clean! I’ll take a little break…but this has always been one of my favorite exercises so I know they won’t be out of my rotation for long.
Thanks for the inspiration!
You better believe it! I feel this way from time to time and usually (for me), I’ll realize I’ve slipped out of quality time with God (even if I’m still in the Word, I’m not really digesting it like I should). Or I realize that there’s just nothing exciting going on and you know we like excitement. Praying that you’ll get out of the funk sooner than later!
Heather @ Better With Veggies recently posted..Setting BIG Goals and the Benefit of Fear
Thanks for your prayers and words of encouragement; means a ton to me! I’m the same when it comes to a lack of excitement in my days/nothing on the horizon… it’s good b/c it keeps us doing things but bad because I can feel discontent for no real reason at times. But having a trip or adventure to anticipate does help!
Even at 55, I always say that I am always learning & always a work in progress. We have our ups & downs & craziness with women hormones for me but just keep trying & never give up!
You are stronf for sure – that video is GREAT! You look amazing too!
Jody – Fit at 55 recently posted..My Simple Way of Eating… Plus Part of My Exciting News
Bonnie.. it’s obvious that we are definitely going to have to make some “outing” plans!!
Madison @ Pilates Makes You Happy recently posted..Filling you in.
sorry to hear you’ve been in a funk! i think it happens to a lot of people this time of year – it’s cold and we are ready for sunshine and some quality outdoor time. you rock and your positive attitude and honesty are a big inspiration! xo
Laura @ Sprint 2 the Table recently posted..My Figure Delay + WIAW
5 pounds? to lose?? Gurl, that is satan trying to put that in your head and steal your joy! You so do not need to lose anything – you look perfect! Great abs as well-I’d love to look like you and to be able to do a pull-up!
It seems though that you are already back on track – so the next tough day you have – re-read this post!!
I love this post about struggles and victories – that is what life is, a constant state of each. We always have to remember that as christians, we fight FROM victory, not to victory!
Hang in there!
Missy
So so awesome Bonnie! Great job on your pull-ups! My trainer made me try to do some today and I laughed at him. I almost got my chin above the bar which is a huge victory for me!
Seriously, I too am stuck in a bit of a rut with my workouts, eating, relationships with folks and I can’t quite pull myself out of it but trying to focus on the little things that I can do and be grateful for. Thanks for sharing this!
Christine @ Love, Life, Surf recently posted..Sneaking in workouts
THANK YOU! …that’s all I have to say. Grateful for your words of TRUTH! You really encouraged my heart today with those reminders (and yes, I do already feel more back on track – I think sharing and writing it out helps me – God too and people like you).
Thanks for the kind words, Christine! Pull ups are so tough…but if you want to do one, you CAN! You’ll keep improving – it’s so one of those practice things.
GLad to know I’m not alone in the rut…although here’s to us both climbing up and out of it! 
Yes! I’ve actually got some plans this weekend…but maybe we could get wild and do something during the week?! On a “school night?!”
Hope you are well! I thought you were still in MT so I didn’t text you…hope to connect soon!
Thanks, Jody! You are super encouraging to me…I really appreciate your words! I look up to you in your strength, confidence, honest nature and commitment to health and balance; thanks for sharing who you with us!
An extra five pounds or not . . . check out those abs, girl!! You’re beautiful–don’t forget that. Congrats on your pull-ups. That’s amazing. I’m currently working on my push-ups. It’s embarrassing to admit how terrible I am at these, so I’m working on improving my upper body strength and to be able to do push-up with good form.
Michelle @ Eat Move Balance recently posted..Dippy Egg Salad
I really relate to this post. Life is full of ups and downs and I need to embrace them both. I’m a work in progress and the Lord wants me to seek His face and take my discouragement and defeat to Him!!
I love pullups! They make me feel like a total beast!
Curly Pink Runner recently posted..Snow Queen
Bon, I love you! First, wow! You sure rocked those pull ups! I’m impressed. What is a tip for someone who wants to get started just doing ONE? I tried doing one the other day -yikes!
and of course a good coffee date.
Also, thanks for the reminder to continually seek time out with The Lord. I haven’t been investing like I should…
And, bummer that we’re not in the same city! I sure wish I could plan outings with you.
Love ya!
THANKS, Anna! You are always an encouragement to me.
I, too, wished we lived in the same city…it’d be so good to connect on a more consistent basis! Actually, I can’t really even imagine living in the same country…that’d be pretty cool too. 
You gave me the idea to do a post on doing pull ups gradually – you CAN do it and progress from none to one to more! …thanks for that idea!
A work in progress – we totally are! That and beasts…
Thanks for the comment!
12! or 11 : ) either way, that’s amazing! And 5 lbs of extra beauty is more like it-I agree with Missy. I’m curious how many reps your started at before the 30 day challenge. I’m also curious, I always thought that with weight exercises that you should only work that muscle group every other day. Is that old-fashioned thinking? I need to get my climbing/hang board back up so I can start building my pull-ups again!